Saturday 12 December 2015

Epiphany


          We all stutter around adulthood, facing the usual crap we have been told about beforehand but never imagined it to be this cruel, this cold, and this isolating.
We all start using tips from the child we once were "To be liked is the key to happiness", so we start gathering friends, as many as we can (with or without filtering), we just need lots and lots of people around to feel wanted, loved, accepted and useful... therefor come the different techniques from pumping their egos, to being their relationship consultant/ shrink/ mother hen...
Next step is them taking it for granted and you being treated with nothing but disrespect, on purpose or not. You'll start to feel unappreciated, unwanted then you'll make the big NO NO : "questioning your value, blaming yourself and feeling worthless"... this Idea will be your main anchor to which more balls and chains will add till you sink in the abysmal depths of depression. 
To this social mashup, you add your student life, family problems, relationship status... which if not destroyed by the above, will be already a train wreck and help you free fall.

          Bottom line is: never measure your worth by what other people think... social status is important don't get me wrong, just don't make it the first item of your priority list.
First and foremost you must know yourself, work on it, perfect it, and be an A student when it comes to being you... know for fact that there is no greater love than the one you'll give to yourself, no greater witness to how great you are than your mirror reflection, and specially that no one is better or less than you... better is a term you use to compare your actual self to the previous self...no third party involved.

You be You: Get better at your studies/ job, do no harm to others, smile and share some of the love you procure to yourself with other people around you. 
You have nothing to prove, you don't have to show your progression, you just let the aura of fulfillment, pride, love and self appreciation get to every living soul around you.
After you do your homework, let everything everybody says (the same people you once tried to please) be Water off a duck's back.

Wednesday 4 November 2015

Dillusion

You get your eyes on it... You make it the prize to get, the person to be with, to get, to care about.

It doesn't always go as planned. You may get so close you can touche it but never make the final step... For sometimes people are either dumb, acting dumb... Or it was you being dillusional from day 1 before that first "Hello" even made it.
You get in a zone so close you watch it everyday without you ever being able to reveal your TRUE feelings... You show them in one way or another, but again people are either blind, taking it for granted, or are too weak to give you the answer to blow you away.

You know, what really makes us stand out and be unique are neither names nor bodies... It is stories and shit we feel. So we dig deep and keep that crap down for no one but ourselves to check on from time to time.

You may see the trailer of it, but remember that editors always cut off what hurts the most... One person other than yourself and I say one, can get a peek of the whole picture... Others only get the cropped version.

Sorry I made it long and blurry as the current mood.

Friday 25 September 2015

M.D...slavery (Modern days slavery)

It has been the uproar of society for the last couple months. Unlike the majority of gouvernement bills in Morocco that goes by unnoticed until people are face to face with some hard to swallow realities and consequences. I am talking about the mandatory service bill for newly graduated doctors... a.k.a M.D slavery.

Since the Moroccan health minister announced his plans to Force newly graduated doctors to work under both a two year contract and undignifying conditions in rural world, the majority of the people considered the already outcasted doctors and Med student as heartless, selfish, unreliable, spoiled beings...
And how couldn't they? Since Mr. Minister has beautifully sugar coated his bill with carefully chosen words such as "patriotism", "noble" and "duty towards isolated rural regions".

The hard truth behind this fairy talish bill, is that Mr. Minister and the government with him started years ago a privatisation policy, aiming to cut off spendings on what they consider "unproductive fields" including education and health.

Mr. Minister accuses us of  being ungrateful, unwilling to work in deprived regions... Us who selflessly on our own expenses and on our own free time climb mountains and visit valleys ,he will be unable to place on a map, just to provide medical care... Us who work 20 hours a week in hospitals plus nightshifts since our 3rd year for the shameful amount of 10$ a month.
Mr. Minister accuses us of neglecting our country's need in doctors.... while in the same time his ministry in 2015 provided only 15 work opportunities throughout the whole country for over 2000 newly graduates.

Mr. Minister : what are we asking for here is nothing more than the dignity of both us and our patients... we are willing to work wherever people are in need ... that's our sworn duty, that's why we chose med school at first... but not under obligation.... not as contractors, but as state doctors... not just for 2 years, but as long as needed....and definitely Mr. Minister not under the abysmal health system you and your ministry are supervising.

If you'd go out loud on media accusing us falsely of being just a bunch of spoiled, privileged, ungrateful brats... we won't do the same... for only our patients are allowed to judge us.
And we will maintain  our strikes, our protests, our defense line.... as long as you consider winning the next elections worthy of destroying your country's health system.

Tuesday 24 March 2015

Sadly ever after

Isolated, cornered, judged and neglected, by none other than yourself. Finding that "comfort zone" ,and boy how much that word comfort is misplaced here.

Stuck in it, unable to plan, to act nor do anything beside regretting every moment you spent there and every moment to come. For you nothing will change... at least not now... not with the actual state of events and your actual state of mind.

Experiences, the fear of disappointing and being disappointed is the anchor that holds your there, hopeless, helpless and refusing any breeze of change that might sweep you out of that dark bloody corner. 

Outside you are the bright, smiling, confident thoughtful and cheerful being you never really are. Wearing that face for a long time you no longer remember who... or what are you beneath it.

Indeed as M.Williamson said "it's our light that frightens us the most, not our darkness"... 

Out of fear... we collapse, out of fear... we compromise, out of fear we never leave that sugar coated hell hole.

    Lorem Ipsum

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